Leadership & Mistakes
Or ask questions, listen, address…
A good friend in the games industry once told me that he considered himself a “51%-er” – implying that what made him a good leader was aiming to get things right more than half the time, with anything above that being a bonus.
To be honest, my experience of working with him was rather different. Not only was his 'pass mark' substantially higher, but he also displayed the trait that I believe is the cornerstone of good leadership – being open to the idea that he could be wrong and taking corrective action when necessary.
The fact is, none of us are perfect; we all make mistakes occasionally, and - for the most part - others understand that. The crucial thing is that you:
Identify your mistakes.
Admit them and calmly explain the reasons.
Outline what you plan to do about them.
In my experience, this kind of approach builds trust and loyalty with the people you’re working with.
But how do you catch these issues in the first place and recognise when your leadership is sub-optimal? It’s not always easy, but there are some techniques you can use and clues you can look for:
1 - Ask for Feedback
This can be a hard habit to get into, but I strongly recommend incorporating questions like ‘What could I be doing better?’ into your meetings and 1:1s. The feedback you receive might be tough to hear on occasion, but it’s better that you hear it directly rather than those opinions circulating behind your back. Counterbalance any self-esteem issues by asking one of the most powerful ‘Coaching Habit’ questions: ‘What was most useful for you?’ This not only helps you feel valued but also cements the content (whatever that is) in your counterparties’ minds.
2 - Develop Your Listening Skills
In my opinion, one of the biggest mistakes you can make in leadership is not listening. It’s a cliché, but ‘you have two ears and one mouth, use them in that order’! A technique I’ve used in the past is to set a timer and take turns talking for five or ten minutes. I also recommend reading up on Active Listening. Adopting this habit will help you build rapport with your team and, perhaps counterintuitively, make your input far more memorable and impactful to the people you’re working with.
3- Be Aware of Emotional Reactions
A negative emotional response (i.e., anger/frustration) is almost always a sign of sub-optimal leadership and should be addressed quickly. If you sense yourself getting angry, something is definitely going wrong – figure out what it is and address it using the steps above.
Interestingly, a positive emotional response could sometimes be detrimental too. While it’s very important to celebrate success in a team, being over-enthusiastic about progress or an event can lead to negative effects later; disappointment if the anticipated outcome doesn’t happen or reduced motivation due to getting too comfortable, for example.
In summary:
Ask questions, listen, be wary of your emotional responses and address the issues you inevitably find. If you can do that you’ll be a much more effective leader, you might even manage 52%!
You can reply to this email if you have any thoughts, suggestions or comments on this post or chime-in on the accompanying LinkedIn thread. I’d genuinely love to hear from you and what you found useful.
Further Reading:
The questions from “The Coaching Habit”: https://www.saent.com/blog/the-coaching-habit-michael-bungay-stanier-book-summary
Active Listening: https://www.mindtools.com/az4wxv7/active-listening
LinkedIn Thread: https://www.linkedin.com/posts/chriskempt_leadership-mistakes-activity-7136763656209362944-dH4D
ChatGPT Thread for this post: https://chat.openai.com/share/eebee990-85a8-4603-a422-86cf1a1f4f65
